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Your Whispering Homunculus: Peculiar Relationships

Familiar by Mike Lowe

Art by Mike Lowe

The odd quirks of spending altogether too much time with a familiar or homunculi and the perils thereof…

“So, dear master, this is the end. The magic jar is readied, and the spellbook is before me, yet still you snore.

“How sad it has to come to this. I only hope my trotter will not hamper my casting. Let the gods of magic and familiars and pig parts be on my side.

“So, goodbye cruel master, prepare to be my slave…”

Although we say it and shouldn’t, this whole master/familiar/follower/companion relationship is odd. It can’t be healthy, spending all that time together; one party giving out all the orders, the other doing exactly as instructed. Surely at some time one party is going to rub off on the other, or worse, rub the other up the wrong way?

The chart below gives you a few suggestions about the quirkier behavior exhibited by familiars and homunculi. It could also, if you wish, be extended to other close relationships such as animal companions, animated undead followers, or animated objects that spend just that little too long in human (or elf or gnome or goblin) company. Some of these traits may not suit particular familiars of followers, adjust them or assign them as you wish.

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Collection of Curiosities: The Gazebo

"Jiro the Kobold" by Pat LoboykoA gazebo is a curiosity of sorts, and some seek to assign more danger to it than might exist. Why not you? Or perhaps go for frivolous fun. The options are many. You can roll randomly for a result below, use the handy number provided with each entry to figure out your result on a d12. You can also pick the one that works for the area in which your characters currently linger.

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Enter the Dragon’s Lair: Voting

The five finalists have been posted, and now it’s time to vote for the entry you enjoyed most. If you haven’t had a chance to read the entries, they are posted below. Voting will continue through 8/25/14.

Ice Bridge by Ronald Corn
The Black Crater of Blinder’s Keep by Christopher Lockey
Rotting Within the Forest by David Adams
Lair of the Toymaker by Stephen Rowe
Slave to the Forge by Lucas Elijah Friedman

Which Enter the Dragon's Lair entry did you enjoy the most?

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Enter the Dragon’s Lair Finalist: Slave to the Forge by Lucas Elijah Friedman

Dragon LairOur expert judges have conferred, and we have our five finalists for the Enter the Dragon’s Lair contest! Today we present the last of five finalist, and you can watch for information on how you can vote for your favorite entry. Our final entry comes from Lucas Elijah Friedman—congratulations!


High atop a lonesome, snowcapped mountain range, a village perches — Bellows Bluff, a town wreathed in perpetual smoke. At its heart sits a furnace that burns as hot as dragonfire, the source of the hamlet’s unlikely prosperity. There are scores of legends surrounding the forge, but all pale in comparison to the truth of its construction.

Half-elf town elder and part-time pyromancer Aelisia Wintrish hides a terrible secret. Many years ago, she captured a wyrmling magma dragon named Fernax, blinded it, and imprisoned the beast beneath her forge and laboratory, binding its fiery essence to runic furnaces. Its burning heart powers Bellows Bluff, channeling flame hot enough to craft masterwork arms and armor (and to power the town’s famous steam baths).

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Enter the Dragon’s Lair Finalist: Lair of the Toymaker by Stephen Rowe

Dragon LairOur expert judges have conferred, and we have our five finalists for the Enter the Dragon’s Lair contest! Each day this week, we’ll post one of the finalists, and then we’ll set up a voting process so that you, our readers, can vote for your favorite entry. Our next entry comes from Stephen Rowe—congratulations, Stephen, for joining our other three finalists with your entry!

Lair of the Toymaker­

Background: In Bemmea, magical playthings and trinkets of questionable quality are all too common. Natives leave such dross for the tourists, and seek only the work of the Toymaker for their children.

All would be stunned to learn that the mysterious recluse is no man or mage. Sanadeen, the Toymaker, is a copper dragon claiming the ancient tunnels that survived the Isonade’s touch. After losing his mate, the depressed dragon spent many human lifetimes finding solace in creative arts originally meant to delight his wyrmlings. His lair filled with the fruits of his labor— from intricate dancing constructs, to ridiculously colored rubber balls that never ceased bouncing.

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